Photo by Rob Olivera

Savage abuse playing out all around us. Are we broken?

The keen savagery with which some men dish out abuse against women on social media tells us all we need to know about our dominance-based culture of masculinity. It is designed to encourage bullying, violence and rape. It’s all right there in the words.

I can not and will not accept that boys are born this way. All the evidence we have shows that boys are born loving connecting creatures, who, by the time they reach adulthood are broken by a culture of masculinity designed to traumatize them into dominating all those around them.

At best, men are unwilling to…


When my tiny dog lets loose, it’s a mix between an air horn and the first seconds of a high speed car collision.

This is way off the normal subject matter I write about (masculinity and culture) but I’m thinking a LOT of people struggle to get their dogs to stop barking too much and I’m here to show you how.

This is my little cutie pie, lovey dovey, seven pound Toy Poodle, Pomeranian mix. Her name is Lillyput. I love her with all my heart. She is a deeply affectionate, caring little personality.

Also, over the last three years, her barking increased in volume and frequency. She can now take the paint off a battleship with that bark. Seriously. …


To be better men, we must be ready to fail and then fail again.

Men who consider themselves “good men“ but who instantly default to a defensive posture when challenged by women should self reflect on why we’re so obsessed with being right instead of learning more. I mess up on Twitter or in an article. I get called out. I own it. Apologize. Learn. Tis human.

The simple fact is, as men, we can never fully comprehend the vast and nuanced ways women get silenced, spoken over, harassed, abused, assaulted. Too many times I’ve spoken up without understanding the tone, context, wider implications of the moment. …


Photo by Anthony Crider

One predicts the other. Bank on it.

In man box culture, we teach boys the rules of being a man. The first thing we teach boys is “women are less.”

We do this by policing boys’ and men’s masculinity via the denigration of the feminine. This begins shortly after infancy and goes on continually thereafter. (What are you, a girl? What are you, a sissy?) Eventually, boys under constant bullying and pressure to live up to man box culture’s expectations, engage in public harassment and denigration of women as a shortcut to masculine confirmation.

Once you train boys to think their gender makes them better than girls…


Biden’s holistic view of national security is a game changer.

Yesterday, Joe Cirincione tweeted out comments made by Joe Biden’s national security advisor, Jake Sullivan about his mandate as defined by Biden.

Joe Cirincione’s tweet is here.

Cirincione’s tweet reads: In his remarks, Jake Sullivan says @JoeBiden tasked them to “reimagine national security” to include “the pandemic, the economic crisis, the climate crisis, technological disruptions, threats to democracy, racial injustice and inequality in all forms.”

Biden is clearly acknowledging the threat that domestic terrorism represents to our national security, in the form of both masculinity extremists (incels, MRAs, MGTOWs) and white nationalists (proud boys, KKK) which are more or less…


Photo by: Matt Johnson

The battle against GOP white nationalism is only beginning.

Dominance-based authoritarians like Trump hold immense power until the moment in which it starts to slip away. Then they lose it with shocking speed as the cowards that supported him flee the legal and political ramifications of his actions.

Trump is not the source of GOP authoritarianism. He is simply the figurehead. NEVER FORGET, because of it’s collective four year silence, the GOP has invested its entire future in Trump’s strong man white nationalism, trading our democratic rights for his power grab.

The GOP’s collective history predates and foreshadows Trumpism, using racism to win elections since first co-oping racist Southern…


Creating a culture of ongoing chaos and violence feeds MAGA’s core appetites

“Little Ben” is Trump’s classic domination-based masculinity at work. Remember Little Marco? Trump’s base is addicted to bullying domination-based masculine culture which underpins the power of authoritarians like Trump. For them, Trump’s bullying is an extension of their own.

Trump’s abusive, bullying tone is a narcotic to MAGA. Hypocricy, lying, tax fraud, adultry and allowing 210,000+ Americans to die from Covid is fine with them. Their own histories of trauma informs their addictive need for authoritarian leaders.

Creating a culture of ongoing chaos and violence feeds MAGA’s core appetites, born out of generations of untreated trauma and abuse. They call…


Trump is the kind of guy Biden likely met many times in his young life.

Joe Biden has long struggled with a stutter. Joe often gives his direct phone number to kids who stutter. He offers them support to grow their courage and overcome the shame this can represent for them. “You can do this,” he says to them.

Now it’s coming to light that Trump’s hammering of Biden in the first debate, his constant interruptions and personal goading was an attempt to trigger a stutter from Joe. He wanted to break Joe and make him look weak. Trump failed, utterly. Joe’s composure was unbroken.

But to look at Trump’s behavior during the first debate…


Photo by dirtyboxface

Why millions of men can’t muster the empathy to understand this issue shocks me.

I’m a college educated white male. I have a deeply satisfying professional and personal life. I’m primarily responsible for washing dishes, cooking, cleaning bathrooms, laundry, and general house cleaning. There are days when it is joyful and there are days when it feels bleak and oppressive. I can not imagine what lifetimes of this work felt like for women of my mother’s generation. How it must have driven many women mad.

They had a lifetime of this work forced on them. They had no choice. This was work which grew exponentially with each birth, many of which were unplanned. I’m…


Photo by Eri Mowmow Heryawan

This is a crucial building block for authoritarian societies.

In our bullying, dominance-based man box culture, we have not simply learned how to turn away from other’s pain. In dominance culture, we are encouraged to have contempt for those in pain, making the turning away easy. This effectively creates a culture-wide disruption of masculine empathy and compassion.

Dominance-based man box culture is based on a narrow set of rules for being a man. Boys who fail to conform are bullied and brutalized until the get back in the box. The rules enforce ideas like “Don’t show your emotions.” “Always be tough.” “Never ask for help” and so on.

A…

Mark Greene

Author THE LITTLE #METOO BOOK FOR MEN https://www.amazon.com/dp/0983466963 Writer/speaker on inclusion, masculinity. BBC, New York Times- http://remakingmanhood

Get the Medium app

A button that says 'Download on the App Store', and if clicked it will lead you to the iOS App store
A button that says 'Get it on, Google Play', and if clicked it will lead you to the Google Play store